It’s so frustrating!

4 Aug

I’m a confident person, I am good at what I do, I am ready for promotion. So why then do I not feel this when I am under the spotlight at an interview?

Why do I suddenly come over all…

“What if I forget what to say?”

“Everyone else waiting looks so confident?”

“What if they don’t think I am serious enough?”

I have heard this so many times.

I am currently working with an awesome client who is so frustrated at not being able to get the top job that she is so massively suited for, because…

When she gets into an interview situation she has found it so difficult to actually show the awesome manager and director that she is to the watching panel.

She does this in real life every day.

When she is dealing with very difficult people and situations and managing to come up with the goods…

She shows authority in the room and people respect and listen to her.

She is able to manage conflict and come up with ways forward that are acceptable and work.

Her strategy produces good long-term results.

But in the interview something happens, nerves surface  – and this is particularly galling because in ‘real life’ she is not a nervous person.

She feels that she is flailing around plastering expressions on her face that she thinks are necessary to portray warmth and authority.

In an interview, she feels she is in an artificial situation, being asked questions about hypotheticals, and it throws her.

She becomes self-conscious.

And that is the real problem.

It means those subliminal messages that she is sending to the interview board, the messages that will colour their judgement are confused, and at odds with the words that she is saying, and her ability to think on the spot.

Does this sound familiar?

Is this you in some measure, in some situations?

It may not be interviews for you, but when the unexpected happens, it is natural to be thrown out of ease and confidence.

Feeling self-conscious as opposed to feeling self-aware.

Knowing what you are saying, being control of how you are saying it.

Most of all, focussing on what you are saying and who you are saying it to.

This is a skill that you can learn.

With my acting background, combined with years working first as a fundraiser, and then the last 15 as a coach and trainer, I know this.

You also don’t need to be a trained actor to do it.

One simple key to the frustration my client is facing over her performance at interview is to know how not to treat the exercise as if it is artificial.

It isn’t artificial to the interview board. They need to see you in the role that you are interviewing for. Your job is to show them that.

To do this in a way where you aren’t ‘putting anything on’.

You do this from the inside out, so that you are being authentic in there, totally at one with what you are saying in a natural and confident way.

If you want to know more about how to be the right most natural and inspirational you in any situation, do contact me, Fiona Whytehead, using the links below.

It is about feeling free to express your true self and most importantly to bring out the part of yourself that you need to show to get the job, the girl, the boy, the prize!!!


If you would like to find out more about my coaching and training services, contact me by clicking on these links either to reach me via email, or to book a call, Fiona Whytehead, or book a discovery call.

Fiona Whytehead
By Fiona Whytehead

Founder and Director, Locus Coaching

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Fiona Whytehead
By Fiona Whytehead

Founder and Director, Locus Coaching

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If you want to liberate and enjoy your voice, be in control when speaking, and make successful connections…

Get in touch with me, Fiona Whytehead for details about what Locus Coaching can do for you